A month or so ago a friend of mine told me about this game she’d been playing. Now I have to be careful about her suggestions, because after all she was the one who got my entire circle of friends hooked on Magic: the Gathering. But this new game is nothing like that. It’s just an online RPG with some slight multiplayer components. It has a stick figure holding a sword in one hand and a martini in the other as a symbol. I’m talking about Kingdom of Loathing.

How do I describe KoL? It is a humorous online RPG, but that doesn’t say much. You know you are in for something different as soon as you start to make your character. Will you be a Seal Clubber, a Turtle Tamer, Pastamancer, Sauceror, Accordion Thief, or my favorite Disco Bandit?  And it just gets weirder from then on. The humor in this game is a pop culture maelstrom where 60’s music references (my gun’s name is Happiness and yes it is warm) are mixed with modern concepts like 1337 sp34k (my hat is a f3d0r4.) There are Indiana Jones ripoffs, Japanese video game parodies, and all kinds of references throughout the game. Even in combat I catch myself laughing at the text, like:

“It jumps up and bites you real quick, like that one movie where the shark bites Samuel L. Jackson. That was awesome.” 

I’m not sure if that is just a reference to Deep Blue Sea (best part of that movie) or if it is a subtle reference to that Chris Farley character on SNL. And that’s what so cool about this game. Everything and I do mean everything in this game is a reference to something.

But it’s not just a bunch of pop culture flotsam. It’s also a really good game. There are a lot of cool quests to go on and cool places to explore. There are class specific things to do, like the Disco Bandits Cocktailcrafting skills. I spend a half hour every day brewing up my own beverages and I’ve already gone thru one Bartender-in-a-box. There is a lot to this game and that causes its one problem. It is a very vague game. The entire game is fuzzy on just about everything. I was adventuring for 6 or 7 levels before I realized that my character should be using a ranged weapon instead of a melee weapon. Now this doesn’t stop it from being fun in any way. It is still fun to play regardless of how much you do or know but at some point you will probably get stuck. Some of the quests are a little tricky and they don’t always provide enough information to know how to complete it. How was I supposed to know that I had to take the Birthday Cake to the Goblin hill and try to kiss the chef? I mean of all the places I could try to get fire that was pretty obscure.

This leads us to the next cool thing about KoL, the community. While it is a multi user game it is not a MMORPG. There are many users playing KoL but each is in their own version with limited interaction with other players. You can enter the KoL chat room (provided you pass the Literacy test), trade messages and even items with other players. You can set up a shop for other players to buy your stuff from. There are Clans you can join and PvP things you can take part in. But you are not flooded with morons asking for stuff, killing you off, bugging you with inane chatter, or any of the other things that happen in MMORPGs. It does a really good job of letting each player define their own level of interaction with the KoL community. And another aspect of the huge online community is the KoLwiki. I think this is one reason that the creators of this game made it so obscure. I think they knew that either thru the forums or thru a wiki that the community would answer any questions any new player might have. Like when you’re wondering how the heck you can ever win Insult Beer Pong the wiki lets you know that you have to use the Big Book of Pirate Insults in combat in order to get the ammo you need for it. Maybe some people could figure that one out on their own. Not me. I needed the wiki.

Oh, and did I mention it’s free? That’s right free. Not cheap or affordable, completely free. I love that.

It’s also really well written. They give you great options and cool responses. Like this one time when I was adventuring on the ski slopes and came across a guy who was having problems with a rival skier. It had the standard options like “help him” and “steal his stuff” but it also had the one I liked: “Offer to help him cheat” and here is the response I got:

“Here’s an idea, kid,” you say. “You want to take the easy way out?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, cross my palm with meat, and I’ll turn your rival into a frog. Or set him on fire — your choice.”

The kid considers for a moment, and then pulls out his wallet. “How much for both?”

Good times.Oh yeah, Meat is the currency of KoL.

There is not a lot of pressure playing this game. It is turn based and limited in how many turns you get a day. The only pressure is if you go out of town or off the grid you might loose some turns after a few days. If you are like me then there is a little pressure to find food and drinks because I feel that it’s a shame if you are not completely stuffed and falling down drunk at the end of the day (one reason I took up cocktailcrafting.)

It’s a great game. It’s cardinal rule is ‘Don’t be a Jackass.’ Vauge like the rest of the game but it works for me. Oh yeah, and it’s free. (Did I metion that already?)

(I gotta include my character)